Students at San Myshuno High were shocked today when their guidance counselor Caleb Vatore spontaneously combusted and died during lunch hour. According to witnesses, Mr Vatore was simply standing outside in the sunlight when he began to smolder and tried to put out the flames to no avail.
Student Darling Walsh told reporters, “He was totally a vampire, I mean, come on. Standing out in the sunlight, bursting into flames… and look at that urn! Then the Grim Reaper shows up all ‘look at my robes and scythe’ and freaking reaps him. It was crazy!”
Tragedy struck again just moments later when janitor Vlad Straud came to see what all the fuss was about before also bursting into flames and dying right next to his collegue’s unique urn.
Principal Hajar Mounib assures us there will be new counselors in place as soon as possible to help students deal with witnessing the death of two staff members and that she’ll be keeping the urns in her office until they can be returned to next of kin.
The Grim Reaper could not be reached for comment.